Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Puffy Actor, Puffy Crust

     Call me, Puff Daddy: I went to a combo casting call/cooking audition in Newton last Sunday. It was another interesting queue: different I think, from the usual cast of characters.
     The call was for a new reality cooking show from the folks who brought you "Hell's Kitchen" with fire-breathing chef Gordon Ramsay. It was a bit less heated though, than Hell's Kitchen. In fact it was damn cold outside the audition site on Winchester Road (Create-A-Cook).
     In some ways it was humorous: hundreds of people jumping up and down, clapping their hands together, trying to keep both their feet - and their entrees warm. And what delicacies! Well, to be honest, there were some obvious duds. Clearly there were actor-wannabees stretching the truth a bit, trying to pass as cooks. And there were cooks, all dolled up but clearly uncomfortable trying to pass as actors.
     I wonder, what was more difficult: an actor trying to cook, or a cook trying to act?
     I wonder, what was more difficult: a cook trying - once inside, to bring their creation back to life in time for the experts to taste it, or an actor - after two hours in the cold, trying to resuscitate their lips in time to produce a winning 'personality'.
     I think I was right in the middle: my Beef Wellington was perfectly pink in the center, but cold as a witches' kiss. And my subtly provocative personality was -after the long, cold wait, ruddy cheeked, but hard to warm up to.
     At least, I suppose, someone tasted the Wellington. The culinary experts were not inclined to kiss me on the cheek.
     We ate well that night. Besides the Wellington, I had made a small batch of my famous (to a very small circle of friends) corn chowder - spruced up for its Hollywood debut with the addition of scallions and squash. They may not be impressed with my acting 'licks', but they won't bite the hand that feeds them.

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